Yesterday must have been one of the most painful days in my life. I went bravely in the morning to get a cyst cut out from my elbow. You would think it’s a small task, but I have a gash across the whole length of my elbow and evertime I move my arm the stitches and skin pull tightly away from each other opening up the wound. With three layers of protective padding, it seems hardly enough because even when the sleeve of my shirt moves across the wound it is complete agony.
Last night with one working hand, I had to chop food, cook it, feed myself, bath myself and remove a massive sticky plaster to change the dressing. Because the area of the wound and plaster is where I cannot really see and because its has been placed so tightly on, it was a millimeter by millimeter pull of 10by10cm dressing, each millimeter brought a larger flood of tears and more screaming out in horendous pain.
I never for one minute thought I would go through this or that I would have to face having to take care of my injured self.
I wonder how people with one arm do it. getting dressed is a challenge, brushing your teeth is a challenge, putting on face cream, putting on a seatbelt….
Now I just need to get through the next couple of days, sleep is hard as with every touch of the blanket I wake up hurting. I need to focus on me.
On top of it all late work nights, late dinners, stressful job isn’t helping and people’s egos, well I’m going to ignore everything until I get better. Until I have the strength to deal with it.